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Saturday, November 5

Simple Twist of Fate

While I stole my title from an old Bob Dylan song, I'm pretty sure it really has little or nothing to do with Bob's idea. But, it's a good phrase that fits my purposes tonight. I'm learning very quickly that things change...very easily. For the past several years, I had a whole blueprint planned for my life. Throughout that entire time, I also advocated living life to its fullest. I wasn't being a hypocrite, but I think I did rule out any twists of fate.

One major twist of fate, of course, is what comes as a result of moving to a whole new region of the United States. It's been a truly magical time because I seem to have much more flexibility in my thinking than before...and I haven't made it a point to improve in that area--it's just happened on its own. I guess, now that I think about it, this could be a major way to survive. After all, a lot of survival is based on one's ability to maneuver through life's adventures and misadventures.

The biggest thing that has changed for me is learning to let myself live a little bit in the sense of a social life and focusing on who I am. I promise not to get too much deeper than that, but it's the truth. It's like a huge incidence of inversion. Whereas school has always been the #1 in my life, I'm learning that that may not be my real desire at this point. I have so much to learn about the world and about myself. So, I've decided to start focusing on that while still holding up my schooling and work. I think both of those areas are greatly influencing my changes, so it only makes sense to remain within both of them.

This may not come across in my blog quite as profoundly as it came across to me, but then again I have known myself for nearly 24 years now. But, I guess things change all of the time, and I'm no exception to that. I guess my first lesson in all of this is not to underestimate the significance of any moment because my greatest awakenings seem to pop up on me at the most subtle of those moments and with the most unlikely people. I know I'm going to continue to prod at all of these new developments, though, because this is the happiest I have ever been in my life...ever. Funny how naturally things unfold and work out when I'm not even attempting to wrestle for the control.

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